Sunday, May 18, 2008

Operation Rescue!

Ha! Ha! Ha!

If you're here because you were searching for ways to fuck with women who want to exercise their still barely legal rights to health care without interference from assholes like you; or, if you're here because you want to destroy labs and other venues of science because you care about animals more than you care about people or the advance of knowledge,


This isn't about cute bunnies being tortured in the lab. This isn't about being self righteous bullying assholes to young women facing a crisis in their life, this is about Chocolatissimo Nutella Bomb Ice Cream!

You're still an asshole, but who knows? Maybe if you ate more ice cream you'd be more tolerable to be around.

When I went to take the custard out of the refrigerator for its final freeze, I discovered that it had set up to a consistency that was too thick for freezing. This happens with frozen custards and is not a cause for panic or despair. It is easily remedied by adding a little more liquid, in this case, a bit more Frangelico and a bit more whole milk while it is all stirring in the stand mixer.

I don't have measurements to give you because I was working purely by eye and feel. The only way to develop that eye and that feel is to make lots of ice cream. Tough assignment to be sure, but, I'm certain you have the will and the courage to achieve it.

Put it all back into the freezer container and go through the steps in the freeze just as before. Layers of ice and of rock salt. As the ice melts keep adding more and laying on the salt with a will.

An important thing I just noticed is that you can see the mark of the fill level on the container. Note where that line is, and where the top of the ice cream is. That growth in volume during freezing is why it is important not to exceed the fill line before you freeze. That is all. Carry on.

Remove the container from the freezer unit, it's helpful to give it a quick wipe down so you don't chance contamination from rock salt or ice brine. Remove the dasher and scrape off the accumulated ice cream into the final container. Don't be all fussy about getting it all, this is one of the best times to stick the dasher into a big bowl and give every kid in the house a spoon.

I'm using the standard, green rectangular Ziplock® plastic containers to lay up ice cream for the parties of the weekend. There's always about a solid quart of overflow for my own enjoyment. In this case it's an old cottage cheese container.

Put it back into the freezer for two or three hours to firm up the consistency, and serve.

This is an intensely rich, silky smooth ice cream. Using the 72% cocoa mass bittersweet chocolate give it an amazing chocolate presence which subtly gives way to the more delicate flavors of the Nutella and Frangelico. Dark, dangerous, intriguingly complex. This stuff is absolutely incredible.

As I gave April her serving, I watched as she took her first taste of it. I watched her eyes widen with delight. I figured why waste the moment so I said "Tell me I'm a genius and you love me."

As soon as the shivers of ecstasy passed she blurted without hesitation, "You're a genius and I love you."

Hey, I takes 'em where I gets 'em. It's always nice to hear.

big brass blog


Blogger Lisa said...

Luverly production. I can taste it vicariously. Thank you for having us along on the ride. All the fun (almost), none of the calories.

I shall just have to console myself with a sip of Frangelico tonight.

4:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You're a cruel man - but fair.

5:43 PM  
Blogger maurinsky said...

I tell you, these recipes make me believe in God - I can almost taste them.

BTW: a friend of mine is trying to put together a set of music for a renaissance festival - she's playing a Viking, so she's looking for fighty-raidy-pillagey types of songs; do you have any ideas?

7:41 PM  
Blogger The Minstrel Boy said...

tell her to look here.

it's one of the better folk song collection pages i know of.

9:12 PM  
Blogger pissed off patricia said...

Can I lick the spoon?

6:07 AM  
Blogger Sherry Pasquarello said...

and april is a genius for recognising that, and for loving ice cream!

6:54 AM  
Blogger BadTux said...

You're a cruel man, MB, to take advantage of a woman who has just experienced the sublime.

Oh fugghet, if I could create concoctions like that I'd take advantage of it too, so I'm hardly one to take the high road here :).

8:58 AM  
Blogger maurinsky said...

tell her to look here.

it's one of the better folk song collection pages i know of.

What a fantastic site! I recognized several songs that my mother used to sing to us. One of the ones I recognized made all the hairs on the back my neck stand up: it was a song called Cod Liver Oil, and my mother used to sing it as she gave us our weekly tablespoonful of cod liver oil.

12:42 PM  

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