Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Straight From The "Whores's" Mouth

With the fall from grace of Eliot Spitzer I took it upon myself to call the beautiful April. She has first hand knowledge of this world. She works as an "escort" in Palm Springs.

At the beginning of the call she was a little taken aback. Her work as an escort is one of the things we simply don't talk about. In the interest of fairness and equity, she's never asked me about road cookies, except from the standpoint of new things to try. I've never thought about asking her, it just has not been a subject that I ever felt like broaching. I've been around the world a few times, liked it every trip too. However, I've always been more comfortable leaving the hows, whys, and intricate manners of that world alone. Especially when it comes to April. Neither of us has a great history of dealing with complications in relationships, it's kind of the main reason we've stumbled into what ever you might call what we have going.

I told her that I wanted to understand how arrangements like Spitzer's work. She said "Just like my agency. The client (not trick, not john, not customer) calls the agency and requests company for an agreed amount of time for an agreed upon fee. "Extras" are negotiated between the escort and the customer. The agency provides access to the woman and nothing more."

I had to ask "What does the customer get for the money." She said "Discretion mainly. We won't ever call them at home or intrude on the rest of their lives. They can ask us to do things that their wives and other non-professionals won't do." I figured Shit! Minefield! Change this topic! Now!" She said "Mostly, it's pretty mundane stuff." (my head says "I don't even want to get into what she thinks is exotic" and I tell the fucking head to shut up)

I had to ask though "What were they talking about when they mentioned he was into dangerous stuff? Condoms? Is the guvner one of those bareback riders?" She said "That's what it sounded like. (short pause) I. Never. Do. That. Ever. There's not enough money in the world for me to do that. Not with a bloodtest from yesterday. Never. Is that what you were worried about?" I told her that was not something I was concerned about. The only times I ever doubt her judgement is when she hangs in there with me. She laughed, that's a good sign. So I plunge on.

"When they talk about the discretion and the privacy how far should it go? Should a girl take extra time in an arrest situation to protect the privacy of a client?" She said without a second of hesitation "Of course. That's part of the deal. That's the main part of the deal. Because my agency is in Palm Springs we get a lot of big names. Business names, Show Business names, Political names. They come to us because they can't hang out in the singles bars or other pickup places, and, most of all, they know we won't talk about it. If we see them somewhere else, we look the other way, and they do the same."

I asked how pervasive these arrangements are in the halls of power. She said "Think about it for a second. Imagine you're a rising young star and you get tired of not being able to just latch onto a good healthy sport fuck without endangering your career. Or, you are afraid to ask your wife about maybe bringing in a third party for a three for all, you just want some no strings fucking, you have the money to pay for it and when it's over everybody goes about their business. Doesn't that make sense? What if you're a Congressman or Statie who talks about morality and sanctity of marriage but your wife quit giving head six years ago? If you like head, and want head, why not just get an escort who will go down and seem to enjoy it?"

I said "So privacy, and lack of inhibition is the main attraction?" She said "Yes. An escort service should be the ultimate safe sex." I asked if she was worried about her agency being outed and she said "We have tapes and records, too many captains of industry and politics would fall. So would the city and county governments, to say nothing at all of the police force. Including the feds."

I left it at that. I thought about getting into pricings but decided against it. After all, I love this girl.

UPDATE:

In another call I asked the beautiful April how pervasive her service was in the society and culture where we live. She said, "It's pervasive and infiltrated enough that one of the girls I work with was at the fundraiser you played over the weeekend in Malibu. She said you spent most of the weekend hanging out with that backup singer you used to date. Is that pervasive enough for your ass?"

This means that the girl she is talking about was staying in the home of the event's organizer, either as a full pledged guest herself or as the escort of another invited guest.

3B's

11 Comments:

Blogger Sherry said...

i think that was a wise decision.

: )

11:20 AM  
Blogger jurassicpork said...

I've never seen dates. Not that it matters much but was Spitzer availing himself of this service as Governor or when he was Attorney General of NY state?

1:50 PM  
Blogger The Minstrel Boy said...

according to april, especially since he had a credit line working, this arrangement was nothing new, probably over the course of years. at her agency the only entree is to be personally referred by an existing customer. she was, quite frankly, apalled at the exposure web access gave the targeted agency.

2:09 PM  
Blogger The Minstrel Boy said...

p.s. she also added that it would not have been at all unusual for a DA or Federal Attorney to target the competition of a preferred agency. that way the client gets to keep his street and courtroom cred as a crusader and get some cut rate strange in the bargain.

2:11 PM  
Blogger Sherry said...

now THAT doesn't surprise me at all!

bunch of hypocrites.

3:17 PM  
Blogger seventh sister said...

I always hate the way they make the poor wife stand by her man at the press conferences. She always looks crushed, which, I know from experience that she most likely is. It seems to be all about saving face for the guy. I'd just like to see one of these women tell him 'hell,no. go and face the press by yourself.' I think they are usually too much in shock to think of that and are still in the 'maybe this is just a bad dream and will go away when I wake up phase.'

There, I really can get my rant on, can't I?

4:29 PM  
Anonymous oddjob said...

It seems to be all about saving face for the guy.

I think it is, and so do others.

5:41 PM  
Blogger Sherry said...

i think so too.

6:26 PM  
Blogger shopvacmaggie said...

The whole thing is ridiculous. He's a middle aged man who wants to be a 'wild man' wooowooo!!! He did not use pimped, abused, extorted girls, he used women who are in business. BIG difference. But America is going to react like 'ohmygodprostitution"!!!!! The only person he has to talk to is his wife, who, by the way, is the only one really hurt by all this so why are the Federal Prosecutors after her???? Actually, it would be great if someday the wife would turn around and say "everyone butt out, this was a professional service, not a pimping ring". Too bad he didn't just lie to all of America thereby dragging the whole country into an immoral, illegal war, while simultaneously thrashing the whole of the country's economy for generations to come, shifting the wealth of the nation by lining the pockets of himself and his friends (oh by the way, where is the enrichment of himslf and his cronies in this Spitzer thing) all while killing thousands of Americans and hundreds of thousands of Iraqis amist a downpour of misery on innocents. Well, then he'd be off scott freeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!

9:39 AM  
Anonymous oddjob said...

Actually, it would be great if someday the wife would turn around and say "everyone butt out, this was a professional service, not a pimping ring".

Except for the little part where as NY Attorney General he made a splash himself busting exactly this kind of business (high end escort service)........

There's also the matter of how he may have shuffled money to hide the payments he made for services rendered. Prosecuting such money shuffling was another part of his legacy as Attorney General.

If he hadn't made a name for himself as a straight-arrow prosecutor I'd be more sympathetic to your argument, but it remains the case that that was exactly how he made a name for himself. Without having done that he would not have become governor.

He's been hoisted by his own petard.

10:33 AM  
Anonymous ta hussain ta said...

Sweetie, your woman's got your number.

Lucky you.

5:34 PM  

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